another letter for my son

Dear Garrett,

Last night as I watched the Relief Society broadcast (on the internet...I love the internet), and listened to the frequent mention of our divine roles as women to be mothers, I couldn't help but recall how this was also frequently mentioned at last year's Relief Society broadcast. And I couldn't help but recall how difficult that was for me then to hear so repeatedly. At this time last year, Dad and I had been trying to begin our family for several months, sadly without success. I remember how, after the meeting was over, a friend of mine and I cried a little together in the hallway of our church building at how badly we wanted children added to our families. That was 12 months ago. Today you are 3 months old. You do the math and tell me a prayer wasn't answered only a short time later.

Garrett, I can't tell you how truly blessed I am to have you in my life! You add a bright light to my days and fill a void that was in my heart. I am the luckiest mama in the world to have you as my precious baby.

You are getting so big, and are learning new tricks almost every day. You now easily and quickly recognize your dad and I and burst into the most adorable grins when you see us. My heart melts every time you look at me and smile, your mouth sweet and toothless, your tongue nearly always hanging happily.

You've started talking, too! Your darling sighs and coos and gurggles tell me that you have a lot to say. I'm not sure what exactly you are saying, but my best guess is that you're telling me what you've noticed and learned while we were out on one of our walks. You love to look around and let this exciting and beautiful world soak through you.

Or maybe you're telling me about all the people you've met, the passers by we meet as we walk through the neighborhood who remark at how adorable you are. Some of them even mistake you for a little doll! I don't blame them, my little doll baby -- you pretty much are the cutest baby I've ever met!

Or maybe you're simply telling me that you love me. Thank you, Garrett. I love you, too.

Love,
Mama